The crucial top

As you may have figured out, I, for a long time, wasn't allowed to talk about the divorce or my relationship with my kids' dad on the internet.

As you can imagine, this was pretty hamstringing to me, as the whole point of writing on the internet for me is to help people pull apart and process what they're dealing with while I pull it apart and process it myself. I felt like I was learning so much but couldn't do anything with it, even knowing there are a ton of you who wanted some data points about how to be a parent with someone you're not together with (and even more of you who were just curious, which is totally OK).

So a few weeks ago I proposed a radical idea to my kids' dad: What if we blogged together about co-parenting. No airing of grievances. No crowdsourcing dispute resolution. Just talking about the process, and how hard it is, and how sometimes silly it is, and how it's not actually ripping our guts out and stomping them into five gazillion pieces, as I thought it would 3 years ago when we were still a long way from being legally divorced.

And he said, "I've actually been thinking the same thing."

So here it is: When The Flames Go Up: A blog about co-parenting after divorce.

We're both a little freaked out about doing this, so be kind.