Vent here safely for Mother’s Day

If you need to vent, vent here. Any topic: being a mother, not being a mother, having a complicated relationship with your mother, missing your mother, never knowing your mother, hating the commercialism and competition of the day, being alone on Mother’s Day, etc.

No Misery Poker: all pain is valid. If you have a kind word for someone else, share it, but don’t feel bad if you don’t have extra for anyone else.

0 thoughts on “Vent here safely for Mother’s Day”

  1. If my husband asks me one more time in that weird, sympathetic voice what I want to do, I am going to vomit. I want the whole day not to exist, dammit! Having a kid didn’t help. It hurts more. She never got to meet him.
    – mother of a 7.5 yo, mom’s been dead 19 years

  2. I sent her flowers. She didn’t call to say she got them. Instead, my father texts me:

    "Package arrived. Talk to u over weekend."

    She hasn’t spoken to me in nearly 2 weeks because she is mad I asked her to bring my kids home for an event instead of taking them to Lowes to look at faucets.

    I am not calling her. This is ridiculous.

  3. I think Mother’s Day is a load of bullshit. My kids tell me they love me every day. I don’t need a designated day for them to buy me flowers, make me food, clean my house, buy me gifts, etc. all in the name of being their Mom. It obligates them to do these things for me for no other reason other than "It’s Mother’s Day". I want my kids to treat me (and everyone else, for that matter) with love and respect every day, not just because some fool thought that I needed a day for it. Stop these bullshit holidays. They’re ridiculous.

  4. Mother’s Day can kiss my ass. My mother killed herself when I was young. My only child was stillborn in a catastrophic pregnancy/delivery that left me unable to have more children. And most recently, my husband left me because biological children were too big of a goal for him to stay married when they were no longer possible. Don’t get me wrong, I have buckets of wonderful things in my life, but Mother’s Day just completely sucks.

  5. Mother’s Day in the US comes months after Mother’s Day in the country where I now live. I forget about it every year until it starts popping up on social media. By then it’s too late to do anything about it. So EVERY YEAR I’m angry at myself for forgetting, again, pissed off that I have to take this pseudo-holiday created by florists and greeting cards companies seriously, frustrated that I live 5000 miles away from my mom, whom I wish I could see more often, and guilty because it’s too late to do anything but give her a call.

    Fuck Mother’s Day.

    1. I could have written this, more or less. My relationship with my mother is complicated and doesn’t fit into pretty social media words. Ditto stepmother. My MIL is placated by the fact that we saw her literally yesterday. 1 out of 3 is pretty much as good as it gets around here.

  6. The meme popped up of telling you to post something your mom said. It’s all gushy, lovey dovey, powerful stuff. Mine is "No one will ever love you." Or maybe, "You’d be so pretty if…." No, I don’t miss my mother. I miss having had a loving, supportive mother who wasn’t disappointed I wasn’t another boy, a different person, not me.

    1. yes. You are not alone. But you know what? You are perfectly imperfect just the way you are, and you are loved.

  7. I have to admit it is hard for me to see all the tributes to wonderful mothers who are their daughter’s best friends etc when my own mother is so incredibly inadequate. I have a relationship with her, but she is the child if either of us is. I now have my own children and am desperately trying to do a better job than was done for me, so I appreciate the effort made by my kids to celebrate me, but seeing all the pain expressed here I seriously question whether this holiday is worth it. Seems so commercialized, like all holidays these days, and that is the reason for it’s prominence. I wish, for the sake of those posting here, I could make it not exist.

    1. THIS. I mother is inadequate at best. Every day I try to model being a better mother than she was. No card fits the bill for her. However, I am a mother now and my husband basically refused to acknowledge that it was Mothers Day. He’s a lazy husband, father and partner so it stung that he couldn’t even lift a finger this one pathetic day.

  8. Mother’s day, like my birthday and Christmas is riddled with fantasies of what could be and years of painful experiences. I try to take the high road, make of it what I want and not be defined by past experiences of my own mother, child and family, but every year I find a new layer. I am tired of new layers. I am tired of memories surfacing that I wonder if they are real or twisted by my own filter of the day.

    I am tired of the fantasy of the perfect day being perpetuated in consumerism – yet I keep reaching for it as it that perfect moment will validate me as a mother, daughter and human being. I KNOW BETTER THAN THIS, but yet I still yearn for it.

  9. From my sister’s mother in law: "You’re such a pretty girl; why aren’t you married?" From my mother: "Maybe you could marry your gay BFF and get artificially inseminated!" From my sister: stuff that doesn’t suck, surprisingly. She always makes a point of giving a shout out to all the aunties (including me) who help her out with her kids.

    But yeah, I’m 38, unmarried with no kids, and Mother’s Day can toss my salad.

  10. Since my mother died four years ago; and since my now-ex resented all celebrations or expectations so much I politely demanded a do-over on my first Mother’s Day as a mom myself (he did nothing and I demanded recognition that this was important to me) and spent the next few mothers days taking care of his mom and grandmother (I like GMIL, MIL can kiss my ass); and since the kids have gotten old enough to understand that it would be nice to do something for me (better than ex ever did) even though now all I want is to kiss their heads and hug them; now I try to forget about Mother’s Day every year because I don’t care anymore. But then I feel badly for not remembering my awesome stepmom! Who deserves so much. So now I’m going to make her that photo book I keep planning, and decide what to send her today.

  11. I’ve been in the hospital on bedrest for 11 weeks now, after my water broke early. Now waiting for Thursday, when my baby will be delivered by C-section. She is in good health inside of me, but there is no telling what her lung function will be until she is here. I am SO OVERWHELMED that I am about to have major surgery, a baby in the NICU, and going home to my 3 year old. After doing nothing for so long, I am so afraid of how weak I will be, and how prone to PPD I will be. My son was a handful as an infant and I have heard preemies are very needy. So scared that I will not be able to handle this.
    Not to mention I haven’t had alone time with my hubby in over a month. We talk about things over my 3 year old, who wants us to just pay attention to him. Communication is so important to our relationship working, and we have been lacking in that severely.
    I’m starting over on all fronts in less than a week. So scary!

  12. My mom is in hospice and rapidly declining and she’s just a few days shy of her 60th birthday. She’s far to young in my opinion to pass away and I don’t know what I’m going to do without my mom. Now Mother’s Day is going to be doubly painful because not only will she not be here but this is the time of year she’s going to pass away.

  13. I parent and love hurt, HARD to love kids. SO much harder than moms whose kids love them back. I should have an amazing day, but it will suck. Those moms are loved back every day. I want just one day. One. But no.

  14. Being a single mom, mother’s day can come and go. there’s no celebration of the hard work and balancing act I endure on a daily basis. If your family structure doesn’t fit the norm, then the rest of us are left in the dust. I just wanna wake up and it be Monday already!

  15. I don’t need a day to celebrate being a mom. I do it every fucking day on my own with a challenging child. What I need is an official mother’s break day. Love my kid, but I love me too.

  16. my mother is a narcissist and a codependent i am only now learning to mother myself after 50 years of looking for love where none could grow. i have two girls who have learned some good and some not so good things about love from me. Mother’s day is largely a pile of hard stuff for which i am required to buy presents for a woman whom, if she wasn’t my mother i would have nothing to do with.

  17. I am spending Mother’s Day with my mom. But she’s not the woman who raised me, my Grama is. I wish it were ok with my mom for me to spend Mother’s Day with my Grama. But every year she insists I come visit her then. I wish I could show my Grama, just one year, how much I appreciate what she did for me. But my mom is so selfish and childish. I honestly am scared of how she would react if she knew how I really felt.

  18. I miss my Mom. She died when I was 15 years old – 45 years ago. On days like this – Mother’s Day – let alone Christmas & my Birthday – I only wonder how my 2 girls – now grown, with children of their own – can let these days pass without a "Hi" or "I Love you Mom" go by. A recent major surgery didn’t bring a "How are you doing?" Worst of it is – I have NO CLUE as to why the communication even stopped!

  19. I need a Mother’s Day bomb shelter. I haven’t had a relationship with my own abusive and personality disordered mother in over 15 years, and my soon-to-be-ex husband had me served this week with papers in which he filed for sole custody of our toddler, for whom he has always done as little parenting as he could get away with. It is much too much this year.

  20. My mom died five years ago. I miss her so much. When she was alive, I’d send her a card for Mother’s Day. Or I’d call. Or I’d send her flowers. She would complain that I spent too much on the flowers. She would get mad that the card was late (it often was). She would say "well, I’m going to let you go, this phone call is costing you a fortune!"

    So while I miss my mom and I would give almost anything to have her back, there’s a tiny, terrible part of me that’s kind of relieved I don’t have to worry anymore about getting Mother’s Day wrong.

  21. I hate mother’s day. Not only am I living with infertility, but I also have to acknowledge the pain I experience growing up with my mother. She was verbally and emotionally abusive to me and my brother. I still live with the damage she did to me. I wish I could just sleep through this day and the bullshit, gushy posts from people who grew up with loving, compassionate mothers. Well, it could be worse. It could be father’s day.

  22. Man, fuck Mother’s Day. I know it was started by a woman who was sick of seeing how mothers never get any shine but that was AGES ago and people have no clue anymore. And honestly? FUCK IT.

    I think moms are great. In fact, moms are the real MVPs, for real. But this day… My mom & I have a mostly pretty great but undermined by stuff I don’t have time or energy to deal with (with her) relationship. I am not a mother. Mostly by choice, reinforced by a cruel reproductive disorder that means I have no room to change my mind. Alas, it never fails, if I dare venture outside the house, random men harass me EVERY YEAR, under the guise of ‘wishing you a happy mother’s day’. Well fuck you, fucknugget. Why must you assume that I’m a mother? Have you not thought about how cruel it is to wish a HMD on someone who doesn’t (want to) have children and/or even can’t? Why can’t you pause to think that maybe your greeting doesn’t apply –in the past (even worse?!), now, or in the future– and no, I will not just be grateful that you’re ‘trying to be polite’ because your brand of ‘politeness’ is actually hurting me. But no, no… pausing to consider the object of your penile affection would get in the way of your nonchance at landing a screw.

    Here’s a tip: if you’re soooo concerned about acknowledging random mothers, take some earnest greetings to the moms who’ve been incarcerated, many for protecting their kids from abusive partners. Oh wait, that would require a functioning heart.

  23. Most of the time it’s easy to be happy for people who still have their mothers, and some days it feels like the grief is as fresh as ever. On those days, the days when it feels like I’ve been sucker punched, sometimes I’m mad. Or sad. Or lonely. So today I’m going to say it.
    You were supposed to be here. You were supposed to be here when I held my sick boy in the hospital. When I felt like nobody in the world could talk me off the ledge. Every time everything came crumbling down.
    You were supposed to be here when I said yes to the man of my dreams. When I heard my baby’s heartbeat. When I held my little girl.
    But you weren’t. You couldn’t be. I understand. But I miss you. I miss you every time you’re supposed to be here and you aren’t. I miss you every time I don’t know what to do. I miss you every time I long for home and can’t exactly figure out where that is.
    So happy Mother’s Day, wherever you are. Wish you were here.

  24. My Mom died on my first Mother’s Day and it was my son’s half Birthday. I still have the card I was going to give her that day. I never knew how much my Mom truly loved me until I became a Mom. I’m glad I got to witness her love of being a Grandma. It will be 9 years on Tuesday that she has been gone. I HATE Mother’s Day because it hurts SO much being a Motherless Mother. It hurts everyday but knocks the wind out of me every year. I try to allow my, now 2 boys, to celebrate me but I have never been good at faking it. It gets harder each year as they get older and can see my pain and hurt. I’m sorry my boys don’t have their Grandma and that I can’t make that ok for them. I think next year their should be a Motherless Mothers cruise where we can jump aboard to escape the whole weekend. I just don’t even want to hear Happy Mother’s Day because it is like a dagger.

  25. My Mother’s Day started at 3:45am with me trying to tend my sick, 7.75yo, who was scream-crying because she couldn’t breathe and apparently never gets invited anywhere. I had no luck whatsoever soothing her and was bumped by her dad, which was a kindness on his part by still hurt my feelings because kiddo is perpetually pissed at me because she blames me for my close relationship with her 2.75yo sister and the fact that said sister can do things that she can’t. (She has anxiety, ADHD, and Asperger’s and has been going through a really rocky patch lately.)

  26. I don’t need a holiday. I know my kids love and value me every day. And for 40 years I dreaded this day because no matter what I did, or what I bought, I couldn’t create a relationship that didn’t exist with my mother. The anxiety and stress this year are gone. My mom is finally a soul at peace. And I’ve been released.
    The only sadness I feel in her death is the same sadness I felt when she was alive. Sadness for the little girl me who grew up without mothering.

  27. I called my mom, but I honestly don’t care.
    I have almost zero photos of my mother and I growing up. There’s a reason I don’t like to call

  28. I hate the celebration of this day for the fact it ruined my marriage. My wife is a great mother but forgot that i also exist in this equation.

  29. My childhood was a constant stream of being called fat and stupid by my mother. All while being sexually abused by the son’s of family "friends" when they babysat me and my older brother. Years later I found out that my mother not only knew about the sexual abuse but gave her consent. As much as I like to think that I’ve let things go, Mother’s Day is a day filled willed with pent up rage and refuelled depression.

  30. Today I was told by my husband I’m a shitty wife and mother. My marriage is dead and I’m struggling raising two preschoolers, working part time, keeping house, basically sucking at life. I’m scared for what my 5 year old is learning from my life about relationships and life in general. All she wants us for me to play with her, but I’m so busy picking up the peices as my husband screams all day at my 2.5 year old for basically being alive, I have nothing left for her, it’s taken all I have not to fall apart. She looks at me with those sad eyes and my heart breaks into a million peices. It has taken the worst, most miserable, painful mothers day ever to realize it’s time to leave, but I have nothing, no where to go, no friends, no support system. I am utterly alone. My life is broken and I don’t know how to fix it.

  31. I hate that I learned I didn’t matter from my mother’s words and deeds.

    I hate that I believed her lies.

    I hate that I learned I wasn’t creative enough, quiet enough, worthy enough from my mother.

    I hate that I believed her lies.

    I hate that I married someone who abused me exactly like my mother did (only worse).

    I hate that it took me 40 years to begin breaking free.

    I hate.hate.hate the pain, lies, bullshit.

    Thank you for this space.

  32. I am 40. My sister is 45. We both have children. But today, if we don’t dance attendance on our mother, we are in for a year of guilt and blame. And, in fact, my sister is already in deep shit for refusing to leave her kids at home alone today to go do what our mother wanted to do. She wanted her kids with her on Mother’s Day, so she’s a bad daughter who needs to be punished.

    My mother doesn’t know it yet, but yesterday we made reservations for next year. Just for us and our families. If we’re going to fail and be bad daughters no matter what we do, we might as well be bad daughters who are doing what we want to. I feel guilty and free at the same time.

  33. I’ve spent all day doing chores and housework. My husband has spent all day working on his new hobby.
    I feel like I’m failing at work, as a mom, and as a wife because everyone wants all of me all of the time and it’s not physically possible.
    My mom is the last person I call if I’m struggling, so all the gushy Facebook posts make want to puke and quit social media. I will be very glad when this day is over.

      1. Ditto. FB is horrible. Funny thing, my mom is on FB and replies to other people’s posts, but never likes or comments on mine or my brother’s posts.

  34. Being a pet mom is not the same as having real kids. Like. Are you kidding??? It’s a dog. When you sacrifice your body and push a human out of your vagina come talk to me about being a parent. I find nothing more insulting than dog owners demanding they steal a day designated for people who have given their lives to their children.

  35. My FB feed is so full of my friends’ mothers, looking so healthy and so ALIVE. I almost can’t stand it.

    I wrote a big political thing on my own page, which I’m rather proud of, about reclaiming the radical, communal, activist origins of the day, but really, I just want my Mama.

  36. The endless loop of FB pictures of people with their mothers is making me hellishly cranky, as are all the puffy-hearted ‘tell your mom you love her today!’ messages. It is not that easy. My mother’s still married to my father, who abused me for 9 long years. They really don’t make a card for that.

  37. I love my mother but it’s a mixed relationship. She didn’t raise me, left me to other family members to raise me and it left me with this deep fear of being abandoned, of being loved and then being left. Fuck. I want to leave that behind and just get on with my life, know she made her best choice at the time, But you know what, I’m pissed. I never had a choice or say and it left this incredible feeling inside of me of fear that I can’t just let go off. I want to believe and trust people that they won’t just leave without a trace , on a whim, with no say from me. But I can’t I live in this fucking fear of abandonment.

    So I am mad and I am sad on mothers day.

    And I know I’m a fucking good mother because no matter how hard it is, I would never consider leaving my child to be raised by someone else but me.

    I know she just didn’t know any better and didn’t feel she didn’t have much choice but fuck it still hurts.

  38. Two years ago I said goodbye. I’m 54, almost 55, and two years ago, because she’s a nasty, mean, person, she told me I was a mistake, and never wanted. I responded that she was pretty lucky she got me because I’m so awesome. I walked away that day with my head held high, and I know I’m an amazing woman, and I feel pity for her, but dammit, on Mother’s Day, I still miss her. It’s dumb. She never wanted me, raised me, verbally abused me the entire time, I don’t need her in my life. I’m healthier without her venom. But I miss her. I miss having a mother.

  39. i am sick to death of every single ad, of anonymous people wishing me happy mother’s day, asking me how i plan to spend it … i thought this year would be different because my parents were away and i wouldn’t be forced into a room with all of my family and be put through an uncomfortable situation … i am currently single … i am divorced … i was unsuccessful in carrying my children to term … days, dates, reminders trigger … soul memories that are forever inscribed on my heart …

    i am not asking for sympathy … i am not asking for attention … i just wish that others would think twice before offering out so much … i wish they would just wish you a good day and be done. life is difficult and how our culture focuses so much on this ideal family puts unrealistic expectations in others minds …

    i enjoy my solitude … yes, i am lonely some days but overall … i am grateful. i am grateful for my journey … grateful for the people i have encountered along the way even the ones that drifted in and out of my life as each person taught me a lesson that i needed even if i didn’t realize it at the time.

    you do not need to feel guilty if you know me that you have children … if you are privy to my story … do not feel guilty or feel bad for me … do not pity me … do not look at me or avoid me … just live your life … love your children … love yourself. be happy.

    enough –

  40. Thank you for doing this. It is so easy to get lost in ones grief and think you are alone, when, in reality, we are never alone. Thank you. I wish peace and love to all who posted here.

  41. M.E. Moi

    I think the hardest thing for me are all the photos of mothers and their daughters. At the hospital. At birthdays. At little moments. At big moments. I don’t have a memory or a photo of me with my mother. Did that say something about her intention to end her life shortly after I arrived? Oh, how I wish I knew. And I wish I knew her.

  42. All these types of holidays are just a bunch of emotional extortion. They cause so much suffering and disappointment for so many people, who get sucked into sub consciously that they are not good enough or don’t have enough or aren’t doing enough. All based on societal pressure of what our relationships "should be like", and if they aren’t like "that" it must be something wrong with us. I call Bullshit on that. Basically it is commercialism at it’s best. Thank you for the forum to vent and read others who are like minded with disgust and willing to call it as it is. Ahhhhh, I feel so much better, the connection to others is so profoundly good to have.

  43. And every year I get reminded of how great everyone else’s mother is. Mine isnt. Fortunately, I can say that i take this day to love and honor the many amazing women who stepped in to do the job of mother and protect me from my own.

  44. my mother is a terrible woman. at least she has been to me, my whole life. I constantly tried to forgive her and kept hoping she would get better (?) with age or time or whatever but she did not. and on this, my 40th year, I am done with that relationship. and today I tried to keep my shit together but while reading all the Facebook posts about how Mother’s Day should be about all women, or women who are mothers in spirit or act like moms or feel like moms or change the name to caregivers day I sort of lost it. because I AM a mother. of four gorgeous kids that I love and appreciate and I work hard to not transfer my own mom issues onto them. I think people who are actually mothers should get one goddamn day that belongs to just them. and everybody else can stop freaking whining about how they are aunts but more like mothers or they are single dads but more like mothers, or they are infertile but really want to be mothers…. I AM A GOOD MOM AND I DESERVE ONE GODDAMN DAY OF RECOGNITION.

  45. Today I’ve been moving slowly.
    Taking lots of breaks to be alone, keep my hurt and disappointment, anger, at my own mother from spewing all over my sweet child.
    It’s hard. It’s so hard.
    I have much to grieve and vent, so much to rage about.
    And so much to be grateful for, now, that feels out of reach with the heavy load that has surfaced today.
    It’s heavy. So heavy.
    I want to set it down.
    especially the guilt of what I’ve carried into my own mothering.
    today I cooked. lunch i wanted.
    and made cookies. for them.
    I just want to savor the act of being good to my child and husband, and feel guilty for all I’m carrying.
    i feel not good enough, i feel icky receiving as if I haven’t proved myself yet.
    yet. yet. yet.
    I feel graspy for a Mom I never had, sad to have the mom I do now.
    I want.
    I want.
    I want.
    I want what i didn’t get.
    I want to love myself like its natural for me to do, like I deserve it and to not settle for any less than I need.
    I want to not see the perfect pictures of moms and daughters today because it hurts.
    it hurts so bad.
    I’m jealous.
    So jealous.
    I want that.
    I don’t have that.
    I don’t have the home and parents to go to when I need it.
    I have me. And it’s scary.
    It’s a lot to need, and a lot to need to fulfill AND provide for my own family (my own bio child, step children, grandchildren…) when I didn’t and don’t have that.

    yay for cultivating self strength, blah blah blah…this path is HARD and I need help and someone to catch me as I’m bumping along and feeling like I’m failing at every turn!!!!!!
    I want a Mom.
    I want to know what it’s like to have a Mom.

  46. Got an advanced degree and went 200,000 in debt to get it. In this economic climate I don’t make enough money to pay down my debt let alone buy a house or save for the future. Mother’s Day reminds me that I still can’t afford children fear I will never have the financial stability to have my own or to adopt. Going to college was the worst decision I ever made.

  47. My mum said she’ll thank me for my card when it arrives – I mailed it a week ago. I am pretty sure that she threw it in the bin.

    I can’t even remember why I am getting the silent treatment any more. It’s been so long now.

  48. There is a part of me that longs to be a mother. To have a child in my arms and look at them and feel so much love . This child is mine. I get to see them grow and blossom and become the person they will be. I long to have the deeply loving partner (hate the word husband as it feels like an entrapment. I don’t want to be a ‘wife’ but a partner feels equal and all kinds of safe and warm things) who is such a loving father to our child and actively participates in their life and shares all responsibilities equally. I long to raise our child with so much love and care and awareness that my own parents did not have and do not have. I don’t want my child to feel like her emotional needs are not being met. I would like her to feel like she is heard and understood and no matter what the world says of her, she is always loved and perfect as she is. I grew up with a father who gave the silent treatment like it was something every dad did. My mother raised me and my sister well yet I feel I was not given the emotional support I needed as she did not have it herself. My mum has so much love in her but is so worn out by being with a man who never gave her a damn thing she needed. I grew up seeing this relationship and feeling it was normal to feel like you have to walk on eggshells around a man and that you have to give and give and give and never get a thing returned. My did is psychologically abusive even if he has no idea that is what he has done/does do. I have seen my mother and the light go from her the way he talks to her and is and the way in which she still takes care of him and the way she says like me, she has no love for him. I love my mother very much and I have carried responsibility for her, been the parent. I have been trapped at home scared to leave her with him and I feel she does not want to be alone with him either. I need to live my life. I am 33 years old and I need to live independently. I feel sad she has never been loved the way in which she deserves to be. I have never been loved the way I have deserved and have only ever met boys (not men) who were just like my dad, emotionally unavailable and stripped me of everything. I am so scared of repeating my mother and fathers relationship I have stopped myself from trying anymore. I don’t believe in love.

    I still feel that part of me longing for a child and a truly loving partner . I can see the image so clear and I feel myself cry tears of joy to be there.

    I just don’t know how to get past the fear of my history and past.

    Mothers day for me feels like I wish my mother could feel loved and cared for, to be able to receive and feel worth that. Just like me.

  49. She breaks my heart. She tells me I’ve lost her forever. I believe her now. Still I take so many actions behind the scenes to help her. She’s totally unaware. Every day I think the pain is going to kill me. Every day, it hasn’t so far.

  50. thank you for creating this space!!!
    i love my mother, however that being said… i do not like her!
    i somehow instinctively knew very early on my mother couldnot/wouldnot
    give to me what i required, i gratefully found other women in my life
    who were there for me. these days as i near my 60th year of life, i have
    developed a relationship with my mom that works for me!

    as far as being a mom…. 3 adult children all in their mid to late 30’s
    of the 3 the middle one & i have the healthiest relationship!
    the eldest is full of rage at me for the abuse his father inflicted on him,
    & that i did not leave sooner. he threatened me several years ago & is no
    longer in my life, i love him, always will, do not need his abuse. healthy boundaries!!

    my youngest my only daughter…. is mean, cruel, manipulative,
    this breaks my heart ….. i love her, & yet can not stand being around her…

    over the years i have discovered i am my own best mother….
    i love them, however choose to have peace & harmony in my own life.

  51. I love my mother and she is a good mom, but she is THE most passive-aggressive person I know. She’ll give any of her kids the shirt off her back, but you never know when she’s going to make you feel like shit for taking it.

    I’m scared to death I won’t be a good enough mom for my kids, or have the sort of relationship I want to have with them. They’re babies right now, but I already feel like the oldest knows I’m inadequate.

  52. My kids behaved atrociously to me on Mother’s Day. In the morning, breakfast was late because my husband wasn’t feeling well, and I got to deal with moody, sulking, rude, hungry kids.

    In the afternoon, I asked them to clean their things off the dining room table and floor. Outright refusal, bad tempers, and hours of complaining later, I was emotionally spent and miserable. And a whole day of seeing all the fun my friends were having with their kids didn’t help.

    All I wanted was a quiet day at home, with cooperative kids and a walk around the neighborhood. Apparently that was too much to ask for.

    I’m still in a bad mood. Each time I begin to recover, one of them acts up again…

  53. I spend all day taking care of people, making sure they have everything they need and are happy and prepared… work, at home….who’s taking care of me? I am lucky to have a great mom and mother-in-law, and love my kiddos, but I feel so tapped out….

  54. Mothers Day is a sad day for me because I am not a mother and probably never will be one. I try to find joy in still having my own mother around, and I certainly don’t begrudge anyone who has what I so desperately want. But being 38, unmarried, and with no kids feels like Total Failure, and Mothers Day is a horrible reminder of that.

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