Parenting Truths 28: Parenting can cause trauma

Parenting involves a lot of low-level but constant trauma. Everything from the chronic sleep deprivation to the physical stress to the worry to the isolation. Unless you have a ton of support around you constantly, it’s impossible to escape feeling isolated and stressed (either a little stressed or a lot stressed), pretty much constantly for the first few years of your kid’s life. Add another few years for each kid. And some parents continue to feel a lot of stress for years and years, depending on their family set-up, finances, school situation, childcare situation, etc.

I believe that a lot of parents are carrying around some trauma from our children’s younger years, and may still be immersed in that trauma.

No wonder we’re tired, and carrying around some extra weight, not sleeping well, and feeling like there are days we just can’t get it together. I don’t know how we heal ourselves, but I believe that rest and physical movement and good food and tons of water are key. Along with as much laughter and loving contact as we can find. And a healthy does of cutting ourselves an enormous break. 

This is hard. We’re not broken, but we’re scarred. We can do it.

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