I made a decision last week to reverse a decision I’d made over the summer. (Sorry to be so vague, but it’s kind of not all that important, although when it happens I’ll tell you.) I’d been holding on to that decision, trying to make it work, excusing things and excusing myself even when I resented the whole situation. So when I made the decision to reverse and go in a totally different direction, it felt like this huge weight off my shoulders.
Then, yesterday, I had a conversation with a friend of mine from business school, who told me almost the exact same thing was happening to her (but on a much larger scale). She’d made a decision, committed to it over the summer, and followed through. And found herself horribly unhappy, feeling totally out of alignment with who she is and what she values and where she feels loved. And guilty about having made a bad decision. And like a failure.
And then she decided just to reverse. And as soon as she made the decision, she felt relieved, and not like a failure, and things started clicking in a strange way and she found a substitute for the original decision that was even better, and is all set to go on her new, reversed course that feels like her.
Right on the heels of that conversation I had another one with someone who had just come to a realization that one of her core beliefs was wrong. And that she might have to reverse.
I’m wondering if this is a season of reversing. Or of examining and correcting course to be on a path that matters to us. In the email I sent out yesterday (I send one out every other week-ish or so–you can get it by signing up in the box there on the right) I talked about deciding what you want to do by working backwards from the feelings you want to have instead of choosing a goal because it sounds like something you should do.
Those of us who are reversing course decided to do it because we felt so bad about our decisions, and we paid attention to those feelings, even when logic said we should just stick it out and suck it up.
I’m wondering if any of you have reversed course lately, or have been considering reversing course. What was holding you back? How do you feel about your decision? Are you feeling more in alignment with yourself now?