Peace #1: If you would like to do something to increase gun control in the United States, please read this post from Moms Rising (thanks for the tip from Holly): Demand the NRA and Congress Stop Blocking Commonsense Regulations That Protect Us All

Also, call your Senators and Representatives along with State Senators and Reps and Governor (that's 6 calls) every day to ask for gun control.

I just called Michigan Governor Rick Snyder to beg him to veto MI Senate Bill 59, which allows concealed weapons in daycares, schools, and churches. Daycares. I called him at 517-373-3400. You can email him at

I you are going to try to argue that there's no need for gun control, don't. What Elana Pate thinks is a good summary of why anti-gun control arguments don't hold water: Please take your arguments someplace else and have respect for those of us who are grieving these kids and educators, and trying to make our communities safe.

Peace #2: Randi Buckley, who has her head wrapped around some ways of honoring yourself when you're feeling fragile, is offering a teleseminar this Thursday night called "Healthy Boundaries for Kind People." It's 90 minutes long, it's only $20, and it can give you some ideas for dealing with the rest of this holiday season if you get told you're "too nice" a lot and are feeling like you're being overwhelmed. Recording sent if you can't make it live. Full info here.

While I am absolutely not too nice, I signed up for it to learn some new strategies and maybe how not to hurt my friends who actually are too nice.


30 thoughts on “Peace”

  1. Totally agree with the gun law changes but I keep waiting for an equal swell of passion about increasing mental health resources. The same theme keeps coming up in these situations and yet we always focus on the guns, not the illness.

  2. Steph, the guns are the no-brainer. Mental illness support is more complicated. And guns (legal guns) kill people (kids) every day, even without mental illness involved. That’s why I’m focusing on them right now.

  3. @Steph, respectfully, I disagree. I would love to see better mental health services, but I really, truly, do not think that is the way to stop these mass shootings. First, not all people who kill people with guns are mentally ill, not even mass shooters. Second, for some of those who are mentally ill, the shooting is their first “break,” and third the treatment options we have are not magic- there are meds, yes. Most have some pretty unpleasant side effects. And people go off them. Like, for instance, the young man who killed people at Virginia Tech.We should increase mental health services because people with mental illness are human beings who are suffering and they deserve our help. Of course we should do that.
    But we should not expect our mental health professionals to be able to correctly identify which people are dangerous and prevent these sorts of tragedies.
    If we want to prevent these sorts of tragedies, we need to remove the means to kill so many people so quickly and easily.
    I actually just wrote about all of this last night, trying to get myself to move on. I will be crass and link to that post here because I really, really want to make sure we don’t think we can increase school security or improve mental health services enough to fix this. I am afraid anti-gun control people with use the mental health issue as a way to dodge the need to fix our gun laws, and that would be tragic.

  4. “If we want to prevent these sorts of tragedies, we need to remove the means to kill so many people so quickly and easily.”I emphatically agree, Cloud.

  5. Perhaps we non-Americans can also support- I am reconsidering all future travel to the USA until something is done with respect to the gun laws.

  6. Thanks for taking a stand on such a critical issue, Moxie. The work you’re (continually) doing on this blog is so important.

  7. Thank you for this post, Moxie.I live in Vermont where the gun laws, or rather lack thereof, are absolutely shameful, the NRA’s wet dream. So I’m calling my state senators and rep as well as my governor. In this small state you can actually call them on their home phones and speak to them directly. The two I reached were very positive about gun control.
    Things I learned that are true for my area and are probably equally true for everyone else’s:
    1) It’s very important to speak out for or against specific legislation when it comes up (here, we can expect gun control legislation in the new year)
    2) Calling is much better than emails (which are easily deleted) and letters (which are skimmed then disposed of).
    3) Calling your local rep may offer the best chance of influence because s/he represents fewer people than the senator.
    4) Leaning on your national delegation can help influence your state laws as well; if your U.S. senators and representatives are leaning on your state delegation it’s much harder for the state delegation to resist.
    Please speak up, everybody. This is how we make change. It could make a huge difference. I am making it my goal to do something every day until there is significant change at the state and national level. Please do the same.
    Anon, I can respect a U.S. boycott but if you do that I think you should write to President Obama and some other choice figures or media organizations to let them know what you’re doing and why.

  8. I thought gun control would be a no-brainer after this too, but all I keep hearing is “If teachers were allowed to have guns, this wouldn’t have happened.” Huh? Really? I might need to make a list of the reasons I like to live in Georgia….

  9. In a comment thread to an article on one commenter posted that if the principal had been armed and had come out of the room with “guns a-blazing” (or some phrase like that), then the tragedy could have been averted. I simply do not believe that any educator, or any sane person for that matter, would just somehow burst out of a room, in a school, firing a gun. I just don’t see it. I think perhaps that is a simplistic solution to a problem that will not be easy to solve. Perhaps.

  10. Cloud raises some good points. Not sure if this story received coverage in N.America, but early last week in China there was an attack at a school – with a knife. Many wounded, traumatized but I believe no lives were lost. Not ideal, but clearly a better outcome than had gums been available to the perpetrator.However, I do think that there needs to be better ‘what do I so if I suspect my family member/neighbour is planning or is capable of something like this’ resources. I’m sure most have read the blog about being the parent of an aggressive/mentally ill child and the lack of help available other than finding something to arrest him/her for. That’s a huge problem. If we are to trust our ‘prickly’ feelings that help us anticipate danger, what do we do with them? I’d love a dot point, easily shared article covering who to call if you feel this (like post-911 for terrorist suspicions) but it doesn’t ‘t look like it exists. I know this opens up a nanny state argument as well, but I’d rather the fears be checked than deal with this aftermath.

  11. The three things that drive me most crazy about the “arm the teachers” arguments:1) If you arm the teachers you’re basically saying you accept there will be open fire in schools–rather than saying this is unacceptable. You are saying no place in society can be a safe haven.
    2) So if we arm the teachers, do we arm the daycare and the preschool teachers too? Where does it stop?
    3) Even if the 2 above points were a-OK with you, with our schools and daycares strapped to the breaking point, who exactly would train the teachers to be crack shots, in their oh-so-abundant spare time?
    Of course, the people who are mellow about 1 and 2 are likely the same ones who think that teachers are livin’ the easy life, suckling on the government teat, as one of my conservative relatives put it. To which all I can say is, OK, why didn’t you give up that cushy job at the weapons manufacturer and go make the big bucks teaching?

  12. @Jilly, I am far from being an expert on this, but if it is a child you are worried about, I think this organization might be able to help direct you to resources: suspect you could also call your local public health department and they would be able to point you in a reasonable direction, but that is a guess.
    I will certainly not argue that our mental health system needs to be improved. And I agree that we have made it far too hard for worried families and friends to get their loved ones help if they suspect there is a mental health problem. I made two donations to help me feel I’d done something concrete over the weekend: one to the Brady Center and one to the Campaign for America’s Kids, a mental health organization. So it is not like I do not think we should work to improve our mental health system- I think we should.
    My only concern is that people will think that we can avoid dealing with our gun problem by fixing our mental health problem. Even if we poured much, much more money into our mental health system, I just don’t think we’ll ever have the diagnostic accuracy required to have the mental health system be our defense against gun violence.
    We really do have to deal with the guns.

  13. I can understand and respect your desire to forestall a back-and-forth style debate of the gun issue on your blog. Those rarely accomplish anything. However, the strong implication in your post that those who happen to see the issue from alternate perspectives, do NOT grieve the dead or want to make communities safe, is unfair and not the type of rhetoric that I would expect from Ask Moxie. Vilifying those who disagree is not standard practice here so I will assume that you didn’t realize how that sentence read.They *want* us to be divided and at odds. A house divided against itself cannot stand.

  14. This is wonderful – thank you! Calling your Rep seems like such a good idea and I have to believe if we all did it every day it would have an impact. I am also with you (and Cloud) on the reasons to focus on gun control.

  15. This paper puts forward some good point cloud. Don’t know the story received covering the N. The United States, but earlier this week in China have a attack in a school – a knife. Many people were injured, but I believe that no trauma were killed. Not ideal, but obviously better results than gum available offender.

  16. Where I live asking sonomee if they own a gun would get a “yes” about as often as asking them if they owned a car. The truth that when secnds count the police are ony minutes away is quite obviouis in rural America.I bought my first pistol a few weeks ago, primarily for home protection and to carry on walks and bicycle rides. You never know what kind of animals my pop out of the woods. Bears and mountain lions have been reported in my county. I’ve seen a bobcat on my back porch and in my front yard. Plus a wild dog or coyote is always a possibilty.As for doctors, my doctor made enough mistakes in my treatment for me to go elsewhere. Simple stuff like incorrectly running glucose test and such. We could save a lot of lives if doctors policed themselves better.I think I’ll use Trey’s response if asked. I keep my gun unloaded but the clip and gun within reach of each other.

  17. WOW Gabi! Thank you so much! Your photos rock! Really awmsoee pics and what a fun time. the boys look fabulous and so does my sweet, yet crazy (not blonde) wife. Hard to do much with my old mug unless you Photoshop Tom Cruise onto my body tho .Cheers and thank you for a really fun day!

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