Um

I'm still here. And basically OK. (Thank you for checking on me!) Just too much work, and seven states in the past two weeks, including my 20-year high school reunion. Which was really, really weird, but good. And then this morning I was writing a post in my head in the shower but then discovered that my glasses were broken (grrr–cats!) and my only back-up are my sunglasses, so I'm dealing with that at this minute, and everything's a little dark and red-tinted. Also, did you know that if you hire someone at work, you actually have to train them to do the job? They don't just show up knowing everything already?

I'm going to be home for six more days in a row, so should be able to write some actual posts for you instead of disappearing as if I'd been vaporized.

What's going on with you?

85 thoughts on “Um”

  1. Glad to hear you’re OK! Same old, same old with me: sleepless 15-mo, uncooperative 3.5 yo, crazy busy at work. Dull, but I’ve decided to make my health more of a priority, so moving more, doing yoga in p.m., drinking more water, eating more vegetables and fruit.

  2. Moxie,So glad that you’re all right. As in as all right anyone having to wear sunglasses all day can be. My late cats broke much more than my 2 and a half year old toddler so far, but they didn’t have opposable thumbs holding a permanent marker pen. ” Drawing mummy! ” she said sweetly. There was the time my foster rescue kitty leapt from the windowsill onto the centre of the Christmas table. I digress.
    The drawing with marker pen was sad as DD and I are in residence at my late great aunt’s house and it wasn’t my sofas and chairs. Childless great-aunt left it to me and another cousin and between us we’ve been dealing with stuff, stuff stuff and the usual patching up the house for sale.
    We take it in turns the cousin and I but she works full time, so we just do our own bit as we are able to and every time we think we’ve found all the stuff, auntie was a saver we find more. It’s emotionally very hard work, as I can’t help emoting to the things and the memories.It feels strange to be in someone else’s house like this.
    We’re nearing the point where we are cleaning and doing paint repairs full time. I’m good at interior painting and patching and polishing and we’re hiring someone to do the carpets and gutters and all that.
    We have begun to approach valuers and agents and they all say the market is truly dead. So we’re not expecting a sale soon, but it will be a huge relief to get to the point where we can leave the house for sale and be done with dealing with the emotional legacy and all the driving between London and East Anglia several times a week.
    DH has another job and it seems a happier match and he came trained but still had to settle in. DD is having another round of not sleeping again, but she’s talking and can amuse herself more as long as I am with her. With marker pens for instance.
    She also has appalling tantrum like events, thrashing and crying after waking up and when going to bed that can last and last. And she’s in the Yes/No phase as in NO Juice/ take juice away/ JUICE.I work when she does sleep so I sound very giddy as you can tell.
    Your travels sound very involved and glamorous to me in the small old world and what an interesting reunion too. I hope you will be seeing clearly and not through glasses darkly soon.

  3. Lord, Moxie. After three years, you are an institution in my life. I’ve had to go cold turkey for a couple of weeks. Glad you’re back.

  4. Glad all is well with Ms. Moxie!What going on here? I can’t believe that I am still grappling with my short-napping 10 month old. I feel like I have been trying to extend/lengthen/improve her naps since the day she was born.
    I know that this isn’t the worst problem in the world. I am just tired of worrying about it and trying to fix it. I am tired of wondering when it will turn around. I wish that I had a time-machine to go forward 2 years, to see that she will probably be OK. Sigh.
    Serenity now!

  5. Glad to see you Moxie! I am deep in the throes of some really unmotivating depression and just can’t seem to shake it. No energy, can barely get up, trying to stay focused at work and home. Ugh. I’m hoping my new med dosage will kick in soon but it is seriously making me feel so worthless to my job and family.Boy, didn’t mean to unload. But thanks for the forum. Good thing I still have my sense of humor so I know I’m not totally hopeless. Take care-maybe I should try the rose colored glasses.

  6. So glad to hear from you, Moxie! I was starting to worry. Glad things are okay, just busy.What’s going on with me? IMPETIGO!!! Just when I thought we might only have to deal with runny noses for the car trip to visit my MIL before she starts chemo, we discover a skin infection on my daughter and a little on my son. Good times. Luckily, the doctor said we should still be fine to visit with my MIL as long as we wipe down the toilet seats with clorox wipes after my daughter uses it.
    I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: These kids are little petri dishes. But hey, I’m just thankful it isn’t chicken pox or bed bugs.
    @Wilhelmina – Sorry about your great aunt and having to deal with the house stuff. That is very emotionally and physically draining.

  7. @caramama- I’m sorry. Impetigo is gross. But the ointment we got for it will clear any minor cut up, so we kept it around.Around here I’m trying to get my allergies/asthma under control. It’s nice to be able to breathe again, although the meds are kind of pricey, even with insurance. Nothing we can’t afford, but money that would be more fun to spend on other things. Of course, you can’t buy health, so I need to keep some perspective.
    Giving away baby clothes is making me sad, but we are not going to be able to have another baby.
    Generally enjoying fall and cooking/baking too much. The 12 month old daughter of friends is now home from the hospital after her liver transplant, which is incredible.
    And my cats have destroyed so much stuff: numerous cords chewed through, crystal candle holders (wedding present) broken, water dumped all over things that should stay dry, the list goes on.

  8. Glad you’re OK! Mouse & Mr. C & I are well, but we’re on a bit of pins & needles waiting for my sis to find out when her treatment finally starts. They’re jerking her around about surgery dates (or at least just being bureaucratic, which feels like jerking around when you’re very worried) and it’s exhausting and scary and my mom is Not Helping as she is wont to Not Help. So our whole holiday schedule is up in the air too.First grade is cute as hell, I have to say.

  9. I knew you were OK since I saw your post on your co-parenting blog. Not worried.My life is absolutely wonderfully fabulous right this very minute and I want to stop time right here and stay here forever and ever and ever. But, alas, that is not how life goes, so tomorrow, something will hit the fan and someone is going to the pediatrician and so on.

  10. I’ve been thinking of you and wondering, hoping all is was well with your family because after almost 3 years of reading and sometimes posting I feel like I know you:) Glad to hear things are okay in the normal crazy life way.So since you asked….. I was going to send you an email to put out to the community since I think everyone who posts here are super fabulous momma’s. Here are my questions. 1. A: How much TV do your children watch I’ve got a 2 year old that is part taking quite a bit?? Part B I’ve got a picky toddler, yeah I know they all are but mine was born picky. He was the one that didn’t do mushy at all so didn’t do solids till around a year and the ones he ate were limited. So I figured out that he ate a whole lot more with some curious george on than with me talking and singing to him. Now he’s two and in a big boy chair at the table but were still stuck in the tv mode with meals and its making me feel bad about parenting. My other options are force feeding and making him keep sitting down or chasing him around with food sticking it in him. So I guess the question would be is it okay to just eat with the tv on for awhile and transition later to family meals. Have I dug a big huge hole I’ll never get out of???
    On the plus side we’ve been doing Daddy on nights and I’m getting sleep which makes me so much more happy in my daily life!
    Thanks in advance and please be gentle with any comments I’m still a bit fragile:)

  11. @creatingbalance: Picky eater here too! And yeah, food is not a great motivator. We do books with dinner. That might help you break the tv habit (by substituting a similar one–but one that’s a little easier to stomach for you, maybe?) Let him pick a book. Read it with theatrics. Tell him the tv is broken, and this is the only thing you can do. Also, we allow a couple of farm animal toys at the table. The pig, for instance, is a great meal companion. Also–start with pizza or something he really does eat. Good luck!

  12. ok , seeing as you asked what’s up, i’m going to take this as an invitation to draw on the wisdom of the moxie-ites… has anyone had a kid who gets fevers during growth spurts? My son (2.5) has the chubby look about him that usually means he’s going to shoot up in height, and for the last 2 days has been absolutely knackered – like puts himself to bed 3 times a day which never ever happens. Even with the worst cold or flu, he always fights sleep – – only other time he has seemed so tired is the last growth spurt he had. But, the only thing that has me concerned is that he has a low grade fever. can fevers be linked to growth spurts?

  13. Glad you’re back, Moxie! I’m getting ready for a transatlantic flight with an infant, and a toddler left at home with his daddy. So, one dose of resentment from fellow travelers, a sleepless night ahead of me, and a chaser of guilt for leaving the other guy at home. Am basically panicking about the whole thing – mostly just logistic-related anxiety.@creatingbalance – I don’t know at all if this would work, but I find my toddler eats better if he’s alone when he eats (he’s in a booster seat with a strap-on tray). he also has eaten well on the rare occasion i’ve let him have a video with his meal. But with us around he seems to get too distracted to eat. Have you tried solitary eating?

  14. Whew. It felt a little weird to keep checking for new posts and turning away, dejected. Like repeatedly ringing the doorbell of an empty house! Glad all is well!Here’s my new haps- we found out that our nanny was, before she quit us with no real notice because of a sudden cat allergy, taking my then 6 month old daughter to other apartments for unauthorized nanny shares, basically running a little day care ring but charging us for the full solo care price. We were happily doing a part time nanny share with one family but there was at least one other family we had not met or discussed who “hosted” our baby on more than one occassion. WTF?! And she quit, so I can’t even fire her. This only makes my weird nanny trust issues so much worse. 🙁

  15. @Erin, Thanks and yes he does more solitary eating than anything. If i paid attention to him he’d want out of the high chair pronto , George or no George. Now he is in his chair one of those on step up grow with me chairs at the table and if we don’t have the tv on then he has no patience for sitting at the table. I think we created a monster with the tv and I’m having a love hate relationship with it.@Leorah I’ll try a book, he’s picky about that too. Only at bed and only certain ones.
    I have a spirited knows his own mind little guy!
    I guess what I’m grappling with is that I’d like to be able to use the tv for what we need it for and still know that my kid will turn out to be thoughtful, creative and smart:)

  16. This is a weird question but will fall/winter sickies in full swing does anyone else experience all this misdirected ANGER at illness? Not anger AT your child of course, but anger and guilt over not being able do to anything when your baby can’t sleep, is up half the night coughing an fussy, has trouble nursing, etc. Guilt over sending them to a place (daycare) that’s a haven for germs and illness. My baby started daycare this fall and lately it’s been really wearing me down. I feel like she’s sick every other week and it’s really depressing me. I feel like I can get past other challenges with the “this too shall pass” mantra, but I feel like this is just going to get worse. I am staring down this long winter with dread and feel awful. Help!

  17. Glad to hear everything is ok. I have a 3 week old, along with a 6 and 3 year old. My life is about breastfeeding right now and trying not to neglect the older two.

  18. @Jane – I am so with you. 3 illnesses in the 3 weeks babyT has been in daycare, plus the nursing difficulty, plus my hubby and me also getting sick with the goo. I hate it 🙁 And yes, we’re angry too.But quitting work is not an option and I’m not comfortable with the idea of a nanny for reasons @tiffany describes above. Sigh.

  19. Glad you are ok. No time to read the posts now, but you should get a backup pair on http://www.eyebuy.com or http://www.zinnis.com. Zinnis are made in communist China, and will run you about 9 bucks a pair, shipped. The eye buy ones seem to be made in the us at around 15 bucks a pair. At that price, I think it is worth it. Can’t wait to have time to see what everyone is up to. 🙂

  20. Well look at you, posting and everything! Sorry to hear about the sunglasses – that’s super-lame. I’d offer to overnight you a pair, but prescriptions aren’t exactly interchangeable…We fled the public school system for a variety of reasons, and are now mostly happily ensconced in the Catholic school system. That’s not exactly something this Catholic-turned-atheist had expected. We live in a small town, so I found myself hand in hand (literally) with the dentist I fired 6 months ago while we said the Lord’s Prayer at morning circle last week. (our kids are in the same class). Trippy.
    With the elder’s issues being held (mostly) at bay, I’m free to worry about the 3.5 year old’s sudden evil ways. In the last few weeks, he’s gone from delightful and agreeable (for a 3y/o) to someone who leans over and says “Why don’t you just go kill yourself?” to his seatmate on the ride home from preschool yesterday. WOAH NELLY. He’s also been much pushier and more aggressive at preschool recently, though, fortunately, he’s keeping his mouth in check there. Is this because he dropped his nap? Is it a phase? Is he headed for a life of loneliness and petty crime? I don’t know, but I don’t like it much. Anyone with successful strategies to contribute will be given cookies and much good karma.
    Meanwhile: work, marriage, getting a house ready to put on the market, blah blah blah.

  21. @Jane – YES. And I found myself angry with the kids who came to day care sick and the parents who sent them. Like full of rage angry. It wasn’t pretty. Why would you send your obviously sick kid to day care? (And I know why and it did not make me feel better even though I understood the pressures other people faced.) It was not a pretty chapter in my life.

  22. So nice of you to ask what’s going on with the rest if us, I am happy to report my colonoscopy is over (my son told everyone in Dunkin Donuts yesterday thats why I couldn’t join him in that treat), and tomorrow it’s off to burn some nerves in my lower back to reduce some of that pain. I am too young to be old!www.gaynycdad.com
    PS I have spare glasses, but I have no idea where they are!

  23. Glad to see you back Moxie.For me I am dealing with the loss of another friendship in the past year or so. Ex-friend A basically turned ex-friend B against me. I should have seen it coming. I have been grieving like a death but I am getting over it now.
    I would like to ask the other Moxie ladies: How do you feel when a close female friendship ends. How do you cope? What do you tell yourselves about why this happened? How do you move on and continue to keep ourselves open to new friendships?
    How do we even talk about this without sounding like we’re in high school?
    It feels like a divorce but yet, compared to divorce, there seems to be little out there written about it. I know this must happen to other people all the time but where are the essays and blogs on the subject? Why won’t anyone admit that friends can be as toxic and abusive as exes??
    Luckily, I do have a great circle of other friends (and luckily not connected to the ex-2 friends).
    The thing that bothers me the most is that the 2nd friend was so willing to throw away a long friendship without talking to me and telling me what was bothering her. There was zero contact. Have friendships become disposal? If things aren’t perfect, as advertised or the way we fantasize about are they now consigned to the trash heap without so much as a second glance?
    And again, how do we go on after this? Should I bother to invest myself in new friendships? Will they betray me too? How soon – now, in 2 years, in 5?
    Anyway, Whatever to them. Of course I believe in karma for real and may they rot in their own personal hells but yeah….F them! Ha ha!
    Apart from that, life is actually really good and I am succeeding at living in this moment, this one right now….even tho 3yr old is crying….

  24. Oh Queen, I’m sorry. The one thing I have learned is that sometimes people do us a favor when they remove themselves from our lives.One awesome thing here- LK brought home his best report card EVER. We’re lovin’ middle school. After a nightmare elementary school experience, it’s wonderful to see him in a good place.

  25. Last night I got so engrossed by people’s updates that I forgot I’d left the kitchen faucet running.Saved by the marine edge. Yay!
    (Who brings the slapstick to people with actual issues and problems? I do!)

  26. Am one-handed thumb typing bc i got my first bout of mastitis today. tried to drop a feeding. B is 368 days old. Thought we were ready to begin the gradual process of weaning. Like hell she says.Other than the excruciating pain, low grade fever and nausea, things over here are looking pretty good.
    To answer all the questions (that I can remember):
    Yes, I get irrationally angry when the kids an I get sick. They don’t go todaycare/prek and so I feel like WTF. Not that we stay home all day everyday but seriously? I hate seeing any kid suffer sick but I especially hate when they’re my own.
    My 3.25yr old recently told my mother, who was on her annual pilgrimage out west, that he was going to cut her head off, complete with slicing motion across his own neck. Again, no prek, an hour tops of borderline infantile programming (pretty sure curious George does not threaten beheadings!) and this is how he treats his grandmother. She thinks it’s because he was a knight in a past life. While I don’t nec disagree (who am I to say?) I think it’s typical exploratory behavior. What to do about it? Be authentic in your dislike of such talk without making a huge deal is what I’m going with at the moment.
    Friendships…jeez. That’s such a tough topic. I recently broke up with a newish friend bc she wanted to crack open a bottle of wine on a playmate. It was 10am. And while I drink as much as the next person, this was too much for me, combined her hysterical “am I too materialistic?” at our 2nd pd and her gossipy nature. She was really nice and we have lots in common but there were a few nonnegotiables. And some days I think that’s what it boils down to – your crazy and their crazy have to match.

  27. Glad you’re back …Wondering if anyone here’s ever been on Sarafem and what their experience with it was.
    That’s all … busy, crazed, but that’s all …

  28. I’m going to finally delurk after months of thoroughly enjoying your blog (I’ve read all the archives as well) to say I’m so glad you’re back. I’ve been wondering how you are…Since you asked, my daughter (just turned 1!) had a horrible accident with a little crack in a mirror (!?) and sliced her finger really badly so we had a horrendous day of driving to doctor, driving to hospital in peak hour traffic, waiting in hospital all day, nil by mouth so she had 1 breastfeed in 22 hours, 3 failed attempts at IV drip insertion, no nap, reconstructive surgery and then overnight stay in hospital and now living with an injured baby who is intent on ripping off her bandage. Sigh!!
    Look forward to reading your new posts when they’re up.

  29. @crescentgirl: I tried Sarafem (which is nothing but Prozac in a different colored capsule) for a couple of months and threw it away. I was told I could use it for just the crummy part of my cycle but felt like it took days to get into my system and besides it meant tracking start and stop times. When I took it all month long I felt total apathy. I didn’t care what anybody said or did. I didn’t care if I ever did anything creative again. I didn’t care if my child was hungry. Yeah. That’s not good.I went on the Mirena IUD and I’ve got the trifecta of effortless birth control, no periods, and very little in the way of any kind of PMS.

  30. As to how it’s going for me, all of my low-level problems are in a holding pattern. I can’t decide if I’m glad it’s not worse or depressed that nothing is getting solved or moving forward. I need a word for it. Ennui doesn’t fit.Meanwhile my 8 year old DD is suddenly uncharacteristically clingy and I don’t know what to make of it. Just when you think you know what you’re doing, they pull the rug out.

  31. @Moxie,”Also, did you know that if you hire someone at work, you actually have to train them to do the job? They don’t just show up knowing everything already?”
    I know! Don’t you just hate that?!! Glad to see that you’re surfacing.
    As for me, sick with some throat/cold/whatever. Staying home today (& sleeping) helped a lot. Hit my low point this am when I screamed ‘Stop kicking me!’ at DS (was trying to put his shoes on to get him ready for daycare). Argh. I am really not a good sick person. No excuse, but there it is.
    I think this am’s tension was exasperated by a bunch of factors including our concern about our daycare not being right for DS after many staff changes occurred. (And our worry this am that he was resisting going because the staff changes are starting to affect him too). But we don’t have a lot of options. So conflicted about what the best option is for DS. Will be working through that this coming week as I/we really need to decide (for now) if we will change him or not. On top of that, dealing with a bunch of other crap that is less than fun.
    Despite all of this not good stuff swirling around us right now, I can honestly say that DS is a complete source of happiness, and it feels good to come home to our little family of 3 (well 5 if you count the pets). I’m totally loving watching DS be excited about learning numbers and words and the alphabet. He’s SO into it.
    @Charisse, So happy your sister has a date set. When so much feels up in the air it is a bit of a relief to at least have confirmations for things like surgery dates.
    @Creatingbalance, We’re more or less in the same boat. Although I’ve noticed that sometimes it’s just my fear that he won’t eat without watching something vs. it actually occuring. A while ago we switched to eating at his kid table. Him being able to control the sitting down seemed to help. I did notice a period where it seemed better if I wasn’t there, but now I’d say the reverse. Also, he won’t eat at the big table without a fight now unless we are all having a meal together (which only happens on the weekends due to scheduling). The key is that I make myself a plate of whatever he’s eating (or at least the veggie portion of what he’s eating – trying to do some positive modeling) and to sit with him and eat. For the most part I don’t try and convince him to eat anything or even really pay attention to the eating part. I try not to stare at him too much either because I think he can sense that I want to see what he is eating. If I just concentrate on eating my dinner, usually he will just follow suit. He may not eat it all or may not try everything I give him, but he’ll eat something. I’m really trying to follow Ellyn Satter’s division of responsibility. For the most part, I think it’s working. Also, I try always to include something I know he will eat along with something he may or may not eat and something he probably won’t eat. 🙂 The bread usually lures him in, though amazingly he doesn’t only eat bread (some days yes, but not most). We’ve read books as someone else suggested. And I have on occasion been able to put on music or even nothing. My goal is to work towards family meals at the table by the time he is 3. And meals at the table mean no tv.
    @Nej, Ugh, mastitis. Sooooo, not fun. Feeling for you. Be sure to drain frequently. Even if it hurts. Hope it heals fast.
    @Wilhelmina, So sorry to hear about your great aunt and that you have to manage all of that. With a toddler in tow no less. I hope you find relief soon.

  32. So good to hear things are ok (if a little dark), Moxie, and as usual, good to get a sliver of everyone else’s lives too. Like many others on this blog, I have lurked for years finding all of your comments and advice to each other both helpful and inspiring, and so spot on to wherever I happened to be at the time. A big thanks to everyone here. (Sorry if that sounds soppy, it must be the relief that you are all back)

  33. Glad you’re back Moxie.My 3.75 year old has just started full time kinder with her brother and loves it and so do I. Finally have both kids off my hands from 9-4 everyday and it is wonderful for all concerned. Have been run off my feet with work, so the perfect moment to start up again. Am finally feeling fulfilled.
    Still, why is it that the moment I have nothing to do, I walk around the house aimlessly. I miss having my little shadow follow me around (and giving me something to do). Is this what the empty-nest syndrome feels like?

  34. I, too, had bee suffering Moxie withdrawals.With me, I’m trying to cure a bad sinus infection which I originally thought was a broken tooth. My teeth still hurt.
    I also tried Zumba, which was good fun.
    This coming week is Autumn Vacation (Denmark has so many holidays in the spring that we don’t need a spring vacation) and we’re doing a combo of play and work. DD goes to the grandparents so we can finish our stupid half-bath that hasn’t been done for a whole two years, and then we’ll have some friends over and go to LegoLand! I may be looking forward to it as much as kids do.

  35. Welcome back, glamorous thing with your dark glasses in the daytime! My 20th reunion was a few months ago. I couldn’t go, but I have to say I was horrified by the photos. Who are all those old people??Survived Eldest’s birthday party last weekend… Annie themed. Very cute. I dressed up as Miss Hannigan. Minus the flask, sadly.
    I think I’m having a minor midlife crisis. It’s okay. I mean, I’m not freaking out or anything. I just always thought I’d be Indiana Jones by now, not a librarian in the midwest. Very odd. It feels like some kind of existential vertigo.
    Caramama, last year my buddy’s kid had impetigo and Eldest had lice and we were in a coffee shop talking about it and I could tell everyone around us was dying to move further away. You could practically see them breaking out in a rash, just listening to us. Wimps!

  36. #1 is having problems at school (anger issues), #2 decided he wasn’t ready to potty train (physically, he’s not), hubby’s work just laid off a bunch of people and their projected profit chart for next year shows more profit than it should and we suspect more layoffs soon, in his department (very small) and finding a job in his field is “tricky” (we’ve been looking for years) and he’s our sole financial provider.On the upside, #2 decided to hold off on potty training for a month (diapers are stress-less!) and if hubby finds a job it’s going to be somewhere.not.here (here being where there’s no community, no parks, no playgrounds, no pools, no nuthin’) so that’s nice.

  37. well, lessee. ds didn’t potty train despite 4 1/2 days of following him around. his body is definitely ready (dry all nights & naps) but he didn’t understand. anyone have advice for pt with pdd-nos/autism? i’m not in any hurry, but he *is* nearly 4.my bf is wonderful but lives 5hrs away. i’d move, but he’s not happy in his job & i don’t want to have to move ds twice in less than a year if he gets another job.
    my car needs more work done on it than it is worth, so i’m looking into getting another one.
    that’s about it!

  38. @creatingbalance, my 3.5 year old eats with the TV on, too. It makes me feel like a bad momma, but she loves it AND she eats broccoli, carrots, grean beans, brown rice, good meat — pretty healthy meals. I think it’s worth the trade off. Also, my MIL says that my husband ate in front of the TV when he was growing up, and he is a wonderful, gentle, extremely creative and imaginative person.

  39. You did ask (didn’t you???)…Life is really good for us right now but it’s the sheer drudgery of childrearing that gets me. The weekends seem to be dominated by cleaning bathrooms, laundry & cooking. Shouldn’t there be more to life than than? And if I read one more article on how my life/home could be perfect if I just do these little tweaks or spend $200 on b***dy paint I’ll scream! Ok…I’m movign slowly away from the magazine now…

  40. Did your cats try to eat your glasses? I only ask because my dog did this and the receptionist at the eye doctor’s office told me that it’s pretty common. Supposedly, plastic tastes like candy to dogs and cats. Your glasses will pick up your scent the more you wear them. So they are essentially candy that smells like you. Pretty crazy, huh?

  41. Life is good. Finally pregnant (9 weeks along). Thought I was going to fall into the “just nausea” category of morning sickness, but jumped into the “both” category in the car on the way to work today. Yuck. I hate puking. Counting the days to my first ultrasound and then to when we can tell the family. We were going to tell them around now, but the ultrasound isn’t for 10 days and that will be 10 days before my cousin’s wedding. Since this will be my parent’s first grandbaby and the wedding will be the first time we see them, we’re going to wait until after the wedding to tell.

  42. So good to read all the updates. Thanks @ caramama and @ the milliner. I’m sorry for whining about the stuff and the house. My great aunt was a great lady, and did great things in WWII. She left so many bequests to charities and we have been able to give so many things to charity. It’s all wonderful really. It is hard in many ways, but I’m very grateful too.@ caramama Impetigo, ouch. If it makes you feel any better I had Impetigo, ringworm and scabies while volunteering in animal welfare. Not all at the same time. I still remember the doctor actually moving his chair back from the desk with the scabies.
    They’re conditions that get worse with poor hygiene and poor living conditions but you need be neither poor nor dirty. I’ve still got eczema sometimes and DD has it very badly and Impetigo scares me for her as it gets infected easily with her skin condition. Otherwise easily treated!
    Small children are a bubbling cauldron of bugs.And ailments/ @ CS my daughter has a very low grade fever in growth spurts and she feels very hot. Gets chubby, then sleeps a lot and when the actual growth happens she gets a bit of fever. Not a doctor and don’t play one on TV.
    @ the milliner I hope that you’re better soon and the daycare situation sorts itself. We’ve also found that numbers and letters are delightful and have kept DD busy now for months. Enjoy!
    @ Claudia Enjoy Legoland ! On the sinus thing I was sent by the ear, nose and throat doctor to the dentist as the pain in my teeth was not explained by my sinus infection. Dentist was not amused and told me the good doctor knew nothing. Less polite than that. It does hurt in the gnashers when your sinuses are infected.
    @ Queen of Anon, I’m sorry about the friend deserting you. It does hurt and there are actual books about female friendships ending and the characteristic being dropped like a brick at the end. Misery loves company is no doubt why ex friend A palled up with now ex-friend B. It’s not about you but that doesn’t help. Let it heal and try again, friendship is worth it but take your time. It hurts.
    On the telly and dining for two year olds my DD does eat her meals at the big table and there’s no TV.
    Not as impressive as it sounds. On the TV she watches Cbeebies shows and she has DVDs of some of the programmes on it. I let her watch for quite a while, even if it is nearly two hours at a time. She doesn’t sit still in front of it and does other things.
    But I do turn it off after her afternoon viewing. We don’t have TV in the mornings and it’s one DVD half hour story in the evening. . I say ” Bye Bye telly!” and press the button. That’s created really ear splitting tantrums of ” BUTTON! ” from her that went on and on and on but it’s how it is.
    On the at the big table thing I am raising a junior nightclub performer. As in DD is a night owl so she dines with us at 8.30 or 9PM. She’s not got to be anywhere in the early morning yet, and we’ve picked the afternoon session when she starts preschool next year. Any and all attempts to change her to earlier schedules foundered.
    She refused purees and did baby led weaning in a high chair. Then she outgrew that and she ate next to us at a little table. Now she’s on a cushion on a regular chair. 99th centile for height. She has a smaller plate of the same service and a mini set of cutlery. Spoon and fork really.
    She loves to imitate grown ups and that makes all that easier. She and I eat breakfast together and we don’t lunch. We have some fruit and a beverage as a snack at the table but that’s it. She won’t eat three meals and I never did.
    That I find means she eats breakfast and often a good dinner. She’s on a restricted diet due to allergy and on days that she ate nothing I’d fret and worry until I saw that taught her to play me like a violin. Some days all the veggies go in, some days all the meat, some days everything.
    It’s hard to stick with the rule I grew up with that meals are like a no 39 bus. Miss one and another comes along in a few hours. No snacks, just wait but it does work.
    Yes, tantrums that split the ears. With a strong willed little daughter that comes as the cost of consistency. But if I didn’t set boundaries she’d go off the rails.
    And I also find it hard to hand out the fruit and dark chocolate after dinner if nothing was consumed or very little. But I do for consistency.
    I can take her to a restaurant, she’s an urban baby and loves a hostelry, always has, sitting on the big chair, people watching and as long as the service is fast it works fine. She can’t eat much as it’s no egg, ,milk, peanut, bell peppers but she loves bread at restaurants.
    I think everyone’s mileage will vary, and honestly how anyone eats at two is not how they will eat at 20. I do believe that force feeding and being too worried about your tot eating can backfire. Whenever I did it felt like I wasn’t winning and DD losing.

  43. @creatingbalance- I think food is a bit like sleep, as in you get what you get in terms of personality, and all you can do is try to find your own best way through the issues. My oldest is a very picky eater- but so was I, so this was no surprise. We make eating with the TV on a treat, and it happens rarely. But that is just us, not some sort of parenting rule. When I grew up, family dinners almost always occurred with the TV news on, and I don’t seem to be scarred from it. (If you aren’t a picky eater and would be interested in the thoughts of a recovering picky eater raising a picky eater, go to my blog and search on picky eating or food… I’ve posted on it a few times.)My current TV angst is balancing the amount I’m OK with Pumpkin (3.5 yo) watching with the (lesser) amount that I’m OK with Petunia (1 yo) watching. And the fact that I’d really rather that Petunia only watch Signing Time, but Pumpkin is soooo in to her Leapfrog “learning to read” DVDs right now (and actually learning to read from them) that I hate to cut her off. Parenting is one big compromise.
    @Jane- it gets beter the second year. But yes the anger, and the just wanting to scream at the universe- GIVE ME A BREAK!
    Speaking of which, since Moxie asked what was up with us:
    Last week, we had a health scare with Petunia during which there was a couple of days when one of the official possibilities to explain her frequent fevers was leukemia. That has been ruled out, but we are left with it probably being some sort of low level bacterial infection. We’ve treated with antibiotics, apparently successfully, but she is going in for a GI ultrasound today. She can’t eat for four hours ahead of time. My heart breaks for her. She’s going to be hungry and confused as to why her caretakers are refusing to fix that. But I’m sending her with Hubby, not me- we’re still nursing, and I figure it would be even worse if I was there refusing to nurse her. Besides, I held her through two blood draws last week, and will probably be the one to hold her for the follow up one next week. Ugh. I think we should share the pain.
    And then yesterday, I reach into Pumpkin’s folder at day care and pull out a paper announcing that they’ve had a case of chicken pox. She’s vaccinated, but it is one of the not-100% effective vaccines. And Petunia is too little to have had the vaccine yet. All I could think was, please no chicken pox in our house. Poor Petunia has had a rough enough time lately.

  44. @CS and perhaps @ sueinithaca too. I was taught to look for impending growth spurts in 3 stages. First you’ll see it behaviorally – they get nasty and naughty and genuine PITAs. From what I was told this is because they are getting ready for a growth spurt and are actually deficient in B Complex. This is when my sister makes her famous molasses cookies for her 10 year old (sue – think this might be what is happening in your case?). Then they get a bit of a pot belly. Then they sleep a lot. I’m guessing that if their systems are taxed during a growth spurt, their immune system might take a hit and leave them open to whatever is going around.@Queen of Anon – I lost my childhood best friend to a betrayal when I was 20. I’ve always said that I recovered and learned a lot from every romance gone awry, but this is not something I can honestly say I ever really got over. But with time I was able to look back and see all of the ways she never really was a friend to me and how I was a good friend to her every time she needed one. It helped me choose better friends. All I can really say is don’t hide from the grief. It is a real loss. I hope that one day down the road you’ll see that they left to make room for people even better and more wonderful in your life.
    @K – not that you asked me, but I do have a story from my 20th reunion. I was across the room talking to someone and my handsome and charming DH, who did not go to HS with us, struck up a conversation with one of the more popular women from my class. Every time I glanced over, another of the women from the “in” group joined in until he was surrounded by THEM. You know the type- the most beautiful, most popular, blah, blah, blah…the girls that made me feel like fungus all through school. My conversation ends and I head over to join DH. Here is what is going through my head:
    “Isn’t this nice? We’re all grown up now. We don’t need cliques. None of that matters anymore. After all, we’re 38 years old now…”
    I approach DH to join the circle. He puts his arm around me. THEY all give panicky looks at one another and take off like a flock of pigeons. DH looks at me and asked what the hell just happened. All I could say was, “yeah, thats pretty much how I remember it.”
    But the people that I actually wanted to see made it all in all a great time.

  45. Glad to know you are doing well. Seems like you are on the road a lot or flying a lot. Can’t wait for more of your posts. Hopefully you get your glasses all figured out.

  46. I too feel the rage of a toddler sick constantly. No illnesses in the first 18 months of life, except one bout of rotavirus. But he had roseola at 20 months (in addition to perma-runny nose and cough) and then started the deadly round of daycare illness, when I was pregnant and on my own because my husband was living elsewhere for work. DS was sick 3 weeks out of 5 in the spring – every. single. time it was on a Thursday. Talk about WTF? I was filled with rage, but I also turned into the person who sends their kid even though he has a fever. And while I wouldn’t repeat it, I also basically think they’re contagious before they’re symptomatic, so I’m not sure it matters much when they’re all sharing each others germs constantly.@Paola – I’m in Italy! Just wanted to say hi from your neck of the woods. Survived baby’s first transatlantic flight.
    @Cloud – I’ve been thinking about the TV with two kids thing too, since I have a second baby and the toddler has just started watching some videos. It’s so easy to protect #1, but how to do it for #2? It doesn’t seem possible, which makes me feel sad and kinda guilty.

  47. @Erin- I’m just hoping that Petunia learns to read (and speak Chinese) super early from Pumpkin’s videos, and then I can stop feeling guilty.But seriously. I don’t know.

  48. @Rudyinparis- your comment about being Indiana Jones cracked me up. I know the feeling. I had a similar “huh, how did THIS happen” experience when I went to try to write up a list of 100 life dreams as part of a “life reorg” I’m doing. I got totally stuck and struggled to make it to 25 things. It is like I’d stopped allowing myself to have my own aspirations. Weird.

  49. @ErinI’m waving back to you from Milan.
    I’m glad your flight went well. We just came back form a trip to Aus and two never-ending flights. Well one was anyway (38 hours due to engine failure at the start of the trip). My 3.75 y.o surprised the pants off me by sleeping for hours on end and not wanting me to hold or cuddle her. Such an improvement on last time when she was 18 months and wanted to be nursed all damn flight. Thank Gaud for entertinment units. They watched Barney like 3 zillion times ( and now pronouce some words with American accents, like ‘Bowling’, which is really very cute).
    How did your LO handle the trip? We ( well DD) managed to peeve one guy off like 2 seconds after we sat down on the last leg of the flight by kicking his seat. He threated to get himslef moved (like we cared) and wouldn’t let up until hubby in no uncertain terms told him where to get off. Zoe fell asleep on take off and actually slept the rest of the flight so he must have felt like a real jerk for making such a big deal out of a few kicks in the back.
    And re: two ages and tv. My kids are 2 years apart and my eldest just loves the damn thing. Fortunately Zoe( younger) was just not interested until she turned 3, which was a bummer in some wasy, like when I needed them both distracted. However, when Noah was little he was only really interested in Wiggles ( music/dancing) and I was fine with Zoe seeing 4 grown men sing and dance around like morons. But then aginl, she would watch for 2 minutes and then crawl off to do some damage.

  50. I am totally finding this discussion around fevers and growth spurts and the like fascinating. Might explain DS’ seemingly random fevers w/o any other symptoms (I always assume teeth, but maybe sometimes it’s growth spurts), and his occasional penchant for throwing all of his toys (especially the hard ones). Annoying as hell, but also kind of out of character for him.@Cloud, So sorry to hear about the health scare with Petunia. That must have been, well, scary. Hope all goes well for the ultrasound.
    @Elaine, Ha. Crazy reunion story. Things never change, do they? Or at least some people never change.
    @Rudyinparis & @Cloud, I know what you mean about the whole ambitions/aspirations/Indiana Jones thing. I feel like I’m caught in a bit of a twilight zone right now with regards to my own dreams and aspirations and goals. They just kind of disappeared. Or got a bit fuzzy is probably more like it. I feel like they are not gone. But at the same time, I couldn’t define them very well right now for the life of me. Which is perhaps the first time in my life that this has happened. Like I said…twilight zone.

  51. @cloud – I just read your blog. I’m so sorry about Petunia’s health scare. It’s so scary not knowing what’s wrong but I’m glad it’s not leukemia. Just typing that gave me the chills. We will be sending good luck wishes your way.I am gladly putting my dreams and aspirations on hold since to be honest, being a middle class mom was one of my biggest dreams growing up. I really wanted the American dream – the nice-guy-hardworking-good-dad husband, the sweet and beautiful kids, the nice house and the dog. I know that to many that seems lame but I had a super shitty childhood and all I ever wanted was a family.
    That’s not to say I don’t have a fulfilling life outside of being a mom. I do. We hike, I still see my single girlfriends, snowboard season is coming and we already have our tickets. I go to yoga once a week, I find time to read as knit…but the center of my universe right now is my family. And I like it that way.

  52. Just did our first night of control crying after 2 months of coping with 2 hourly wake ups – a breeze! She went down after 12 minutes and slept the entire night! And to top it off, she went down for her midday nap after 2 minutes! Life is about to get so much better.

  53. @Nej- I think it is awesome that you’re living your dream. And its not lame!Petunia’s ultrasound came back as “absolutely normal”, and she apparently didn’t mind being starved for four hours before it was done. She didn’t care much for being held down to get the ultrasound done, though! Still, it is good to know that abdominal surgery isn’t in our immediate future! All signs are that she had a completely antibiotic susceptible infection somewhere, and now it is gone. Phew.

  54. Glad to have you back Moxie!Only 4 weeks of maternity leave left and so far I am unable to secure a job in my field. I moved to a new city at the beginning of my maternity leave to be with my husband, whose job was transferred. I am feeling resentful that I had to give up my previous job which I loved even though I know the move will benefit our family in the long run. Also, not happy about the prospect of working a minimum wage job after going through 4 years of training and trying to come to terms with the fact that I’m going to have to do something as we need the added income. Stressed and bummed, although after reading the other comments maybe feeling fortunate that things aren’t any worse. Hugs to everyone out there 🙂

  55. I was getting worried Mox! Nothing much new here. Well, except a molar. I hate baby teeth. Counting down the days until we get to spend Thanksgiving in Hawaii 🙂

  56. @creatingbalance – my DS only eats when he’s watching “Little Bear.” I grew up on the boob tube and I’m pretty awesome so I’m not that concerned.

  57. To whoever was lamenting the break up of female friendships = what @Elaine said. Been there, done that. It sucks. I’m sorry to hear about it. Life is definitely like high school sometimes.I wish I had gotten street smart a lot sooner, and just proactively eliminated the couple of toxic, gossipy, always-comparing, Mean Girl friends from my life loooong before they eventually turned on me. Which they always do. And yes, the signs were all there, I just ignored them. Some of you out there are probably maintaining toxic friendships as we speak. You know, the ones where you wonder what she’s saying behind your back? Where she makes you cry at your kid’s soccer game, and you wonder “is it me?” Where you secretly hope your daughter is nothing like her? Take it from me, it is so much easier to just start to Be Perpetually Busy with these frenemies, than it is to do nothing while you basically wait for things get to the point where everything becomes all Inflamed and Dramatic, and your reputation and self-esteem are harmed. Ugh, I hate sounding like such a petulant little child about it – but that’s where toxic friendships take us.
    I regret not striking up friendships with a couple of special women over the years who I know now to have been totally awesome people, and real friends. When I had shitty friends in my life I had no emotional space for real friends. Now I’m older and it seems like everyone has their couple of core friends and is not looking to make any new ones. So much regret. I’m totally reaping what I’ve sowed. Ugh!

  58. @Anon Now – thanks for posting your thoughts about friends. I am the original poster. The hardest part for me is that #1 friend – yeah I ignored the toxic signs, but #2 friend wasn’t like that until she started hanging with #1 more. And the fact that #2 didn’t try to talk to me about things that were bothering her. I just don’t get it. I mean, she didn’t even try. For her it was just over. That was the most hurtful part. Guess she was toxic in a more subtle way.I hate feeling like I got screwed because I’m the better person. Yeah I know that sounds whiney, but I keep coming back to that.
    I am finding that more recently close friendships are emerging with people over a long, slow period but they are feeling deeper and truer. Maybe @Anon Now you may have friends you only know a little but keep chatting and see what emerges. Maybe this is how we make friends when we’re older and busier with kids, etc. I like it. It feels less of a risk. So don’t regret what has happened but know that new friends do still keep coming but in less of an immediate way, if that makes any sense.
    Anyone have any book recs on friendship issues?

  59. PS Just wanted to add, people do still want to make new friends even when their older. Just read back over lots of Moxie posts – friendships/loneliness and related issues are a constant theme.This is what keeps me going. Knowing that the possibilities are there.

  60. @Paola – Hi from Rome! The little one did fantastically on the trip. I left the older toddler at home with his daddy because I’ve come for work, not pleasure, and my mom agreed to come watch the baby but couldn’t handle the toddler as well. We flew Lufthansa and had a great flight – baby slept almost the entire time. Even the businessmen sitting across the aisle smiled and goo-gooed the baby in the morning when it was clear he would not scream all night and keep them awake. There were other small children on the flight and I didn’t hear them make a peep, either. Note to self: Fly with a baby before he learns how to crawl! The kicking the seat issue is hard – this happened to us on a long flight when DS #1 was 15 months old. We bought him his own seat but didn’t realize that the carseat would enable him to kick the guy in front of him the whole way, and because he (DS) was so young he didn’t understand “don’t do that.” But I apologized to the passenger, who could not have been sweeter. He said “I have kids too, so I know.” It’s so much fun having the baby in Rome – Everywhere we go the Romans make such a fuss over him, and he just eats it up. It’s so much nicer than the American habit of glaring at every child who dares to enter public space.

  61. @ErinI totally agree about the glaring. Italians just love kids and make a huge fuss over them. Not the Aussies (I’m almost certain guy on the plane was an Aussie), especially in restaurants. Then again, I do have 2 terribly noisy kiddies.
    Hope you get some good weather, unlike us here in the north.

  62. This post is really probably way too late but I’m writing a book on tips for picky eaters … I’m going to pore over all the posts here and if anyone wants to contact me, feel free at zirwes@yahoo.com

  63. I just watched 30 Rock and then hit your blog so clearly I still think you’re Tina Fey and working crazy hours because you’re a real mom and Liz Lemon at the same time. No wonder posts are sometimes irregular!

  64. Well – I’m about to embark on our fourth big trip away this year. My 9 month old is about to board an airplane for the 11th time! I’m hoping it goes as smoothly as the last 10 flights…The pay off is five days in Sydney to catch up with family, eat pastry and visit an aquarium. Hopefuly the husband can blow off at least one conference session to do the aquarium with us. Moo looooves fish.

  65. @Cloud – I am *so* happy for you. I have actually been in the exact same situation (leukemia, HIV, primary immunodeficiency were all mentioned). And now? Bobo is fine. Like better than fine. After a year of flipping day care illnesses and the irrational anger that came with them.5 months went by and not a single week where I made it to work every single day because Bobo was sick at least one day every week.
    5 out of 7 Sundays spent in the urgent care in Jan-Fab, ear tube surgery, 4 (or was it 5) shots of rocephin for strep pneumo), chicken pox!
    A random Wednesday at noon where the pediatrician just said he can’t go back to day care and here we are in the middle of the week with no childcare and a sick kid. He hasn’t been back to day care since (that was a month of stress!) and I haven’t wiped his nose one time since. Not once! No sniffles. No ear infections. No antibiotics.
    Our life is compeltely changed. It’s wonderful. I hadn’t realized how much the “day care illnesses” were negatively impacting every single section of our life. Plus Bobo became developmentally delayed by spending all his energy being sick and recovering instead of learning to walk, talk, feed himself, throw tantrums, etc. He’s making great strides now. The child can throw a tantrum like most 23-month olds now. (And I’m secretly happy about it.)

  66. @Queen of Anon- also with @Elaine. A “friendship” ended last year for me, and surprisingly, a year later, I notice that I don’t miss her at all – so she clearly wasn’t a very good friend to me, even though I thought she was at the time.

  67. @Queen of Anon- a book rec though not targeted at friends specifically is The Dance of Intimacy by Harriet Lerner, PhD. It’s about people’s first families, and why they behave the way they do. It helped me understand more that it’s them, not me.Sorry your friendships imploded. It’s a sucky thing, and hopefully it does give you more emotional room for some better people, and hopefully those people come into your life.

  68. @ Cloud, this is rather late but just wanted to say how sorry I was to read about Petunia’s health scare. Leukemia is scary even to type. I’m glad that it’s been ruled out and hope that she’s better soon.@Sarcasticarry you got a triple bill of deadly possibilities and I’m really sorry that happened. I’m glad that your 23 month old toddler is throwing tantrums ! It’s a great thing to see your child catch up and thrive and I’m so glad he’s rebelling now.
    I never had DD in daycare but she did go faithfully to classes in her first year and picked up infection after infection. My DH called it the plague pits. I thought it was good for her to see other babies and toddlers and that it was good for her immune system. Not quite, she went downhill.
    We also got the deadly dread diagnosis in the form of genetic blight but away from the classes her ears got better and she progressed to walk and talk from 18 months and is now fully caught up. You’re right, life is transformed once illness is not the status quo.
    @ Queen of Anon, The Friendship crisis by Marla Paul is a book I really liked about friendships ending and finding it hard to find friends. She’s got a website too I think.It helped me to realise that it’s not your fault or failure to wind up isolated in terms of friends.
    Jan Yager’s When Friendship hurts is good also, but more about problem friendships. I went through a long phase of making friends with women who really didn’t like me. Oversharing that all had to do my mother, once she died and I got to terms and peace with her that ended. For that Yager’s book was helpful.
    If it helps any I am being slowly but surely dropped by my best friend. It’s pretty open now but has been going on for over a year. She can’t talk to me because she’d rather do a., b. c., but I am on her to-do list. Literally. Don’t know where on the list but I can guess.
    I am sad, really sad but I know it’s about what’s changed for her rather than my being an annoying unwanted clinging vine you have to talk to as it is your duty. The self esteem has gone up. Doesn’t stop it hurting.
    I do think you can’t have friendships without some ending badly. And that many women have been dumped by a friend or friends like in your situation but keep quiet about it.
    Being Billy No Mates is shameful. For me I think I could accept my family had issues I couldn’t help , but I chose my friends and they chose me so something was very much awry with me. Also I looked to friends to be sort of like family. Like Friends the series. Really it hurts but it’s worth persevering making friends.Even though it hurts often.
    In case I make a pitiful impression I am very happy and secure in our little family of three.

  69. More on books on Friends, The Friend Who Got Away is a collection of twenty essays on female friendship ended badly by Jenny Offill. Very therapeutic reading. I was lent it and found it very good. As I wrote before I don’t think women talk about it.

  70. @wilhelmina, Claudia and Hindsight,Thanks so so much. I will check into the book recs. And thanks for making me feel not quite so alone or dysfunctional. I know intellectually it’s “them” but it does still hurt.

  71. @Erin and @SarcastiCarrie – I’m amazed at how lax the guidelines are for sending sick kids to daycare, even at our super-expensive daycare which clearly caters to professionals who do get sick time (or at least paid time off of some kind).I can send BabyT to daycare with tons of snot and a fever up to 100.9 (!). I don’t, but I’m sure that other parents do, given the “rules”. I know it’s a drag to find other care for your kid, but dang, we’ve had 3 illnesses in 3 weeks already 🙁 So yeah, I’m still angry here.

  72. My child is still sleeping. And I say that not to brag because even typing it reduces the chances of it happening again to near zero but I just had to share. It’s like seeing a double rainbow.

  73. @ARC: The rules were fever-free without medicine for 24 hours and fever was 100.4, but there were people who would give ibuprofen in the morning. It lasts 8 hours. And those kids still really had fevers. And they got my kid sick. As for the chicken pox, how could you know? You’re contagious before symptoms and who would think?You also had to be vomit-free for 24 hours, diarrhea-free for 24-hours, 24-hours of eye drops for pink eye, and no rashes at all of any kind unless you had a doctor’s note saying it was eczema. I know for sure people abused those rules. And I know that those rules aren’t good enough (pink-eye can be contagious for up to 5 days after starting the drops, for example). And if a kid vomits at noon and is good the rest of the day and all night, you technically can’t send them the following morning, but many people would.
    But, yes, most kids get sick and get better. Most kids don’t get sicker and sicker and have every illness turn into something much more complicated that ends with a bacterial blood infection. Just my kid (and Wilhemina’s and Cloud’s).
    So, I was (irrationally) angry at people who would send sick kids to day care. I would encourage staff to bounce kids whose noses were pouring out like faucets. I understood their reasoning (both the day care’s and the parents’), but I just could not get over it. I was so angry. Those kids were getting my kid sick, dangit! I still do think that sick kids belong at home (both so they don’t infect others and so they can recuperate and get back to full activity level quickly). But, the anger is fading as Bobo is catching up (today’s assessment: almost age approrpriate! Yippee!). I feel bad that we had to abandon day care. I had really liked the place, but as they didn’t enforce their own policies and Bobo was so sick, we had to leave.

  74. I’m finally able to check back in with you guys! Was visiting the inlaws over the weekend. Great trip, though I spent Monday morning cleaning puke out of one car seat and pee out of the other.@Brooke – Good to know about the ointment for the impetigo. We’ve got two tubes, and I was worried about being wasteful. I hope your partner is doing okay. Glad to hear about the girl’s liver transplant!
    @Charisse – Glad they gave your sister a date for the treatment to start, and I hope it goes well! My MIL’s chemo starts next Monday. Fingers crossed for them and all going through it!
    @SarcastiCarrie – Yeah for having a wonderful moment! I hope it lasts a long time.
    @creatingbalance – If the TV is working for you, go with it! What’s a little extra TV during a rough period in the long scheme of things? I used a lot of TV with my daughter to get through my difficult pregnancy with my son. She’s still a supergenius.
    @tiffany – Wow! So sorry about the nanny issues! We had such a wonderful nanny. I miss her all the time. I wish that everyone had the flexible work environments that my hubby and I have so people could be home at random times, helping you know for sure what your nanny is up to.
    @Queen of Anon – That just sucks. Sorry to hear about your friend situation. I’ve often equated friend relationships with dating relationships. I’m glad to read so many book recommendations on the subject, because friendships are often harder to deal with that marriages, IMO. There is another book that someone wrote recently… let me look for the title… Ah, here it is: The Twisted Sisterhood: Unraveling the Dark Legacy of Female Friendships, by Kelly Valen. She wrote an interesting article for some news magazine a few years ago, and we had some back and forth via email. It should be an interesting book.
    @Nej – Sorry about the mastitis!
    @Kim – Woah! Poor baby and mama! I hope she heals up smoothly.
    @paola – Aw! Empty-nest syndrome! I’ll bet it’s a love-hate thing.
    @Rudyinparis and @Wilhelmina – Ha! I would edge away from my own kids, if I could! I kid! sort of…
    @Rudyinparis – I love the idea of an Annie-themed party! I hope you figure out your midlife crisis thing. I’m going through a crisis of faith, myself. Isn’t it fun?
    @Cloud – Glad the us came back normal!

  75. Our cat is horrible… He lost one of my MIL’s pearl earrings – I found it several months later. Several broken glasses (drinking – usually at 3 am), paper towels and toilet paper, waking people up. The thing that helped? http://www.perfectpetfeeder.com/ Hasn’t let us down once – worth every penny. We got it in Sept 2008 when I was pregnant with my first daughter. Not that he doesn’t delve into general asshatery (does that have 2 t’s?) still, but there is much less. And he doesn’t ask to be feed at three in the morning. Which is nice because we have a one-month old now and she does like to get fed!Look forward to more posts! Glad I haven’t missed much.

  76. Al-Anon Family Groups of Massachusetts Find a Meeting. Massachusetts Al-Anon Meetings. [ Find another mienetg ] . Front door, elevator to right to 3rd fl. Turn left, down hall to conference room. . Farnsworth House Library, 90 South St at Child St, Park At Aggassiz School (Open Step . OD, MON, 7:45 PM, CONCORD (WEST), 01742, 28, 37100, West Concord Union Cong. ..Addiction – Baptist Health South Florida. Alanon Tool Box, Alanon Family Group. For family and friends of people . Conference Center, 3 South, Classroom #2, Baptist Hospital; 7-9:30 p.m. every Friday. . 2nd Floor; South Miami Hospital; 6200 SW 73rd Street; Miami, FL 33143; ..Community Resource Guide:. Agency for Workforce Innovation (WIA) – see Southwest Florida Works . Al-Anon & Al-Ateen. 3. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) – Lee County Area Intergroup . site lists local mienetg schedules. + All Souls Episcopal Church Food Pantry ..alanon daytona beach – Cyberfiber. Jan 1, 2008 . alanon mienetg bluffton south carolina alanon st petersburg fl questions for alanon . alanon west central fl alanon wi alanon web site ..Colorado Al-Anon Meetings. Jun 25, 2011 . Al-Anon & Alateen mienetgs are listed for Colorado along with . Monday Miracle AFG, Al-Anon, Christ the King Lutheren Church, 495 Florida Road . Fresh Air AFG, Al-Anon, SouthWest Hall Meetings, 7964 S DePew ..Abuse. Addiction Services. After the Rain of SW FL, Inc (239) 334-6261. Al-Anon (239) 274-1353. Ala-Teen (239) 274-1353. Alcoholics Anonymous (239) 275-5111 ..

  77. Thanks all, I see we had some stalker spam sohmeow it all just got wiped out. Hope they don’t waste too much time spamming because it just takes me a flick of the mouse to make their rants disappear, and I have zero reasons to read anything they write here before wiping it again since I’ve heard it all before the past four years.

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